A Little Baby Registry Guide

Welcome! Thank you to everyone joining me for this first inaugural "baby-specific" column of A Newsletter. More and more I find it impossible to write honestly about my life without something related to parenthood coming up. I try to be mindful of for those who are not interested in the topic, though something about me that's always been true, is that if I can't write honestly, I don't write at all. A version of writers block, I guess.

At my best, I feel empowered and very much in my "creative bag" writing about feeding my baby, about learning how to parent. At my worst, I feel one-dimensional and boring, a shell of "my former self," worried I'm alienating those uninterested in how many varieties of meatballs I can make in one month (so many). To be clear, I don't believe the latter to be true, and I certainly never feel that way when I read or hear about others experiences. I'm sure any parent reading this is clocking how old Charlie is (14 months) and thinking: Yes, that's normal, right on time. You're in the thick of it. You're not boring. You'll come back. Hold on.

Anyway, rather than be paralyzed with the fear that people won't connect to meatballs 64 ways, I decided to put it all into this little column. A place for the baby food recipes I'm secretly proud of. The recommendations I feel have changed my life for the best. The comment section that might be more helpful than your mom group chat. Sign up here for all of the above and I'll see you soon. Thanks for being here.

Thirty seconds into finding out I was pregnant, I, like most people, had a million questions about…everything. More than actual information, I desperately needed to latch onto something that resembled control. So, I focused my anxious energy into buying stuff. If I bought stuff, I could be PREPARED, and if I was prepared, I would be in control (none of that is true).

But, in order to buy stuff, I needed to know what to buy, what version of that thing I should buy and where I should buy it. As much as I love randomly Googling things at 3am (I really do), I felt like I needed a more direct, personal touch. I was very lucky to have many people in my life who had already been through this whole thing– Some of them extreme Type A personalities who welcomed these questions with previously prepared spreadsheets and Google Docs. Others, more the type to chaotically text me at random hours of the day some life-changing recommendation they suddenly remembered and had to pass along. It truly takes a village. 

Each recommendation, tip and suggestion I received was extremely helpful, while also being a very funny, highly accurate representation of their personalities. How they organized the information, the types of products they used and how much detail they went into for each thing was exactly “them.” Conflicting recommendations were tough, but also reinforced how much of these purchases are personal and not a one size fits all situation though often there was also the exact same recommendation– those ended up being the things I bought and used the most.

In the last few months I’ve had a few friends share pregnancy news, followed immediately by a panicked “what do I need?” (frankly, I can’t believe that I’m in a position to answer that question, given how little I knew a year ago). For everything I purchased that I didn’t end up needing or liking, there was something else I didn’t think to get and needed rushed to my door. No matter how prepared you are, this will probably happen to you, too. Don’t worry, you’re doing great. 

Now, a year (fourteen months, but who’s counting) in, I feel like I can offer at least a high level list of must-have things (and some opinions on a few basics) that we liked, that our baby liked. This list is not exhaustive of what you or your baby will need and focuses only on the first 12 months. It’s a start, but know that there is a seemingly never ending list of stuff you could buy that promises to make your life better/easier. Few people are more vulnerable to being sold to than an expecting or new parent. “THIS WILL SAVE ME!?” you think out loud to nobody in particular, as you unbox* your 83rd package that week.

*NOTE: box cutters are a great investment at this time in your life. There are simply so many boxes.

For a synthesized, downloadable version of this, head to the bottom.

REGISTRY

As a person allergic to formal organization, I didn’t think a registry would be for me, but it was incredibly helpful– I used mine to make/track certain purchases for the first 6-ish months. Even if you’re not having any sort of formal shower, I recommend having one for yourself to just keep a list of all the things you need/want– also helpful to easily link to if/when someone asks “is there a registry?”. 

Everyone I knew used Babylist, so that’s what I used, but also I did find it incredibly easy to navigate. I also liked that there were several purchasing options (i.e. can price compare, buy direct from the site, etc.).

SLEEPING BABY

A Crib: I have never heard of anyone raving (or complaining) about a crib– which is to say I think they’re mostly all the same. Pick one that fits both your budget and aesthetic dreams and you’re good. We had this basic IKEA one for a bit ($129) and it was perfect (we currently have the BabyLetto Pogo in brown, and it’s also perfect).

Note: Unless you plan on using the crib as your bassinet, I personally would skip any "8-in-1" size crib- it felt fussy and unnecessary.

The Snoo: Divisive topic, but I’m not here to argue. I’m only here to say I loved the Snoo and call it a STRONG BUY to anyone who asks. We never even turned it on until he was about 2 months old– I found it useful just for the little straightjacket you clip them into which kept him swaddled and stationary, compact and comfortable and cute cute cute. Swaddling a baby is…hard? Ours was especially squirmy (still is) and seemed to bust out of everything that wasn’t the Snoo swaddle.

Note: We didn’t have any issues transferring him to the crib, but know that’s not always the case. Also, it’s expensive! The site offers pre-owned Snoos for a good discount, but I bought a used one for half price on Facebook Marketplace (you can also borrow from a friend who’s not using/no longer needs).

Bassinet: If you’re not interested in The Snoo, you'll need a bassinet for those early months. I used this Halo– it’s a nice one that swivels.

Inspired by our friends who made it look chic, we also got a Moses Basket which we used any time we weren’t in a bedroom (often, actually). I’d call this a “nice to have,” versus a must have. But…chic! 

Pack and Play: If you travel at all (to another person's house, on vacation…any place you won’t be sleeping at home) it’s a must have. Similarly to a crib, you can pick something that fits in your budget as I’m not sure there is a ton of variation. This UPPAbaby is the one we have and we love it. That said, in our travels, we’ve assembled various brands of pack and plays (many Airbnb’s come with one) – and all seem about the same. This is the one I got to keep at my parents house for when we travel there, which is also great (and a bit cheaper). 

SlumberPod: Again, if there’s any travel in your life and you don’t feel like assembling black out curtains or plastering the windows with sheets of darkness, a SlumberPod is a must must must. Pop this over your pack and play and you have ultimate darkness, which some (most? all?) babies require for any amount of meaningful sleep. Especially helpful in hotel settings or anywhere sharing a room with a baby (it fits inside a checked bag). 

Magic Merlin Sleep Suit: More of a device than a garment, I could not recommend the Magic Merlin Sleep Suit more. I’m kidding when I say it’s worth the purchase just for the photos, but am I? Basically a weighted blanket with arms and legs– it eases the transition from swaddle to sleep sack. I think it’s a huge reason our guy had such an easy time transitioning from Snoo to crib. STRONG buy. 

Baby Monitor: During the first few weeks of parenthood, Max and I both really hated how many “apps” there were to like, do anything. That said some came in handy, like being able to track your baby’s sleep from your phone. 

There’s something to be said about having too much information, so I understand some parents impulse to only do audio monitoring (can hear the baby cry, etc.) but sadly I’m too neurotic for that and having the camera on the monitor is a non-negotiable for me. We love the Nanit because it keeps track of his naps/sleep hours logged so when we forget when he went down, it tells us. We also got the travel one so we can use it on the road. 

Because it’s WiFi based, you don’t have to worry about being “in range” to spy on your baby (we live in a police state!). Especially helpful for date nights if you’re nervous about how they’ll do with a sitter, or when you’re on vacation and they’re asleep in the hotel room while you eat at the restaurant downstairs, if you were to hypothetically do that. 

Sound Machine: Even if you don't need one, your baby needs one. We have The Hatch because it’s the brand of sound machine we were already using and there's an app and blah blah blah. We also have the travel version which is a must buy for both general travel and stroller naps. 

HOLD THE BABY

Stroller: Selecting a stroller really made my head spin. I would stop and ask women on the street “do you like your stroller?” I was…obsessed. What I learned polling my friends in other cities with different lifestyle habits, is that the stroller you end up with is sort of location dependent— do you live in a place where you’re driving more than walking, do you need to take poor street conditions into consideration, are you going to be “hiking”, do you travel often, etc. 

As a person living in New York, some good advice I was given was to get two strollers. One, as sort of the “every day” stroller that has strong wheels for which to navigate the terrible sidewalks, ample storage for all the stuff you’re schlepping, and something that’s light enough to lift up and down stairs (subway, stoops, etc). Another, a smaller, lightweight stroller for travel and short trips in and around your neighborhood. 

For the larger every day, we ended up with a Cybex Priam (gifted) and love it. In my research, it seems similar to an Uppababy or Nuna, though is technically a touch heavier than the other two mentioned. I got ours with the bassinet and car seat attachments (while he outgrew the bassinet by 6 months, we still use the car seat and will for the next few years). It handles like a dream and has plenty of space for all the fruit I have to buy every day to keep my son happy. 

For the smaller travel, we got the Doona. My only critique of this perfect piece of equipment is that it’s only suitable for the first year, give or take depending on how big baby is. I wish it lasted forever. A stroller and car seat in one, in my opinion this is absolutely the most important thing for travel for the first year. For me, it’s too lightweight (and there’s no storage) to comfortably use as the everyday stroller in New York, but it also fits perfectly underneath most restaurant tables so it was my preferred “dining stroller.” 

Car Seat: We went with the Cybex Cloud G. This car seat is a standalone car seat, but also easily clicks into the stroller frame we have (Priam), making it great for travel.

Bouncer: Everyone I know recommended/swore by the BabyBjorn Bouncer. We used it often to hold him when we couldn’t/didn’t want to hold him, but I can’t say our tiny prince LOVED it in the way I’ve heard other babies love it (again: so squirmy). That said, once they start moving around/rolling, you do need a place to put the baby when you’re not holding them, and I’m not sure where else you’d put them? 

We loved our Snuggle Me Organic* and used it daily, probably more than anything else in the first few months.

*Similarly to the dock-a-tot, the version we used has since been discontinued for safety reasons– you can find out more on their site. This link is to their updated version.

Carrier: I love carrying Charlie in the carrier and I’ll do it for as long as my body can support the weight and as long as he lets me. This will be personal preference– try them on in a store, or buy one that’s easily returned so you can try it on and see how it feels. They all fit differently with different support systems that hit at different parts of the body. My personal favorites are the Ergobaby and the Artipoppe (expensive), both of which I still wear. Max preferred the BabyBjorn.

Play Mat/Gym: Not technically holding the baby, but a place to put the baby. After the potato-bassinet phase and before Charlie started to crawl, he was often on the floor on a little play mat. This can also be a thick, single layer blanket. If you’re conscious about design stuff, think of these as an extension of your decor because they will be on the floor in your home all the time– may as well like the way they look. I have many but my favorites were this one and this one. 

These can also be a more elaborate baby gym– We used the Lovery Play Gym. It comes with “built-in” sensory toys, plus a subscription of new toys/information every few months which coincide with new developmental milestones. I found many of the toys useful/fun, but eventually I felt like I had too much stuff and ended the subscription after a year.  

Activity Center: Didn’t anticipate this one, but after it was recommended to me, getting an activity center around 6 months (borrowed from local mom, thank you!) was a HUGE deal for us. We used this one from Skip Hop and Charlie absolutely was obsessed with it. Truly the first time he learned to entertain himself in a place we could put him where we were certain he could not hurt himself. Skip Hop was like a third parent and of course we are kidding but also not kidding. Invaluable for months 4–12-ish. 

FEED THE BABY

The feeding your baby journey is a really personal one– both to you and the baby, and often a very best laid plans, etc. situation. I bought a lot of stuff thinking things would go one way (I bought an entire small chest freezer for ALL THE BREAST MILK I was going to be producing and um, didn’t freeze a single drop of breast milk), and ended up donating so many things (bags for the frozen milk) because they didn’t serve my needs. 

Breast pump: After asking every woman I know, I went with the Spectra 1. Is this the best one? Who could say for sure. The consensus seemed to be (and I can since confirm): Pumping sucks. Some pumps are worse than others, some are better than others, but all are pumps. I didn’t have any specific complaints about the Spectra 1, but also I did want to light it on fire as soon as I finished pumping.

Also, something I didn't know: Your nipple has a size and that size is something you've probably never considered before. Using a "nipple ruler" (swear to god) will give you a number to work with to make sure that you're using the correct sized flanges (another word I learned postpartum), which makes all the difference in the comfort and efficacy of your pumping experience. Anecdotally, most women have told me the flanges that come with the pump do not work for them and they have to order new ones. Anecdotally, feels like when we order the pump, similarly to, oh, I don't know, ordering shoes, that we should be able to choose our size to fit our bodies. A small injustice in a sea of injustices.

Portable breast pump: I liked a portable pump so I could leave the house, yes, but also so I could do stuff around the house while I pumped. I used the Baby Buddah motor WITH the Willow cups for on-the-go pumping (woof) since the BB motor fit so nicely in my purse. Also, while I have you: you will never get as much milk from a portable pump as you will from the regular no matter what they say – manage expectations. 

Bottles: At the suggestion of more than one friend, I ordered about 4 different brands of bottles to see which Charlie responded to. In the end, we went with Dr. Brown’s anti-colic glass bottles but switched to the (BPA-free) plastic once he entered the phase of dropping bottles on the floor all the time. I did find it annoying how many parts there were (it’s what makes them “anti-colic”). Around 6 months, I had “had it” with washing the extra interior green parts and got rid of them and used them like regular bottles and they worked just the same.

“We” also liked the Philips Avent ones. He hated the Nuk, Pigeon and Lansinoh that other babies I knew swore by. 

Note: If you're wondering, I think the bottle washers are a waste of counter space and money. I never put the bottles in the dishwasher– they all got done by hand with hot water and this soap. It's a lot to keep up with in the first 3-ish months, but the bottle washers take FOREVER and I'd just rather wash them by hand than wait 60 minutes for the bottles to be ready.

High Chair: Even before he started eating solids, we used the Stokke Tripp Trapp with the infant insert to hold Charlie and he loved it (more than the bouncer, honestly). Anyway, once he started eating solids, it was our high chair. Easy to assemble, easy to clean, looks nice. This one from IKEA is also popular, and I love this one though it's incompatible with our countertops so we don't use it as much.

CHANGE THE BABY 

Diapers: A diaper subscription, while boring, is an EXCELLENT and USEFUL thing to add to a registry. After trying many other brands, Coterie were our favorites by a mile (even my husband, who thinks all marketing is a scam, agreed). The subscription is brilliant because running out of diapers when you need them most is not a situation I hope you ever find yourself in.  

Changing Pad: We skipped buying a changing table and used a lovely little vintage dresser we had lying around. While some haters said it would not be the right size, they were wrong and we still use it. Pop this changing pad on top and you have a changing table (incidentally, this item was probably a top 5 thing recommended to me by other moms). 

You’ll also want a portable changing pad because especially during the first few months, you will be changing this baby…everywhere. At a restaurant. In the back of a car. At a rest stop. In the park. On the floor of someone else's house. On the floor of your own house. At a coffee shop where there is no bathroom and all of a sudden there is poop everywhere and you’re hoping nobody sees but you’re pretty sure everyone can see. Be prepared. This is the one we have. 

Wipe Dispenser: You might ask yourself “do we really need this?” and the answer is yes. Especially as they get older and start writhing around the changing table you need the wipes handy and easily accessed. We have this one from OXO. We skipped the “warming” one because I am not trying to set my son up for a life where the wipes are always warm*, sorry to my son! *this was, in fact, advice from our pediatrician

Diaper Pail: I also asked myself “do we really need this?” At first, you might not think you do. At first, the little poops don’t smell like much– a friend of mine said (lovingly) the smell reminds her of “pancake batter,” which…sorry to anyone making pancakes ever again. This isn’t so bad, you think. Maybe I’ll just use a trash can with a lid– I surely don’t need to buy a separate trash can JUST for diapers. But soon, you’ll find out why you bought one and feel grateful you did. We have this one, and while it does a good job, you will often find yourself wondering: “could this be doing a better job?”

Aquaphor: I love Aquaphor and have gone through tubs and bottles of the stuff. It’s a miracle product for diaper rash (treatment and prevention), chapped cheeks, you name it. I am aware of the alternative products that don’t use petroleum, but they don’t work as well in my opinion, and my top concern when there’s diaper rash is eliminating the diaper rash. To avoid cross-contamination between cheeks and cheeks, I recommend the large tubes for the diaper rash and tubs for other areas. My pediatrician recommended not to waste our money on the “baby” version as it’s primarily a marketing distinction and I appreciated the honesty. 

BATHE THE BABY

Tiny Tub: We’re still using this little tub (get the one with the newborn insert) that goes in the tub (or in the shower/on your counter if you don’t have a tub). We've long ditched the newborn insert, and he’s nearly entirely too big for it now, but it’s nice not to have to fill up an entire tub.

Thermometer: You think you know how hot is too hot, but I found it nice to actually know the temperature to soothe my anxiety. Now I know and it' s a cute toy Charlie plays with. This is the one we have and it’s classic and cute, but look, a whale! 

Soap: This is my favorite baby-safe soap. I love the way it smells and it’s never once irritated Charlie’s skin or eyes (it also comes fragrance free). I also like their lotion (all around, I really like this brand).

Post-Bath: This is my holy grail of baby skin products. I love the way it smells so much I look forward to using it every night (I love it so much it’s the only baby product I carry at First Bloom). It will enrich your experience to sing “Baby massage! Baby massage! Who wants a baby massage!” during application.

DRESS THE BABY

People will gift you clothes, let them. Register for the boring but functional onesies and pajamas in all sizes up to 18 months to keep you in practical gear so you can focus on more impractical but highly adorable things like tiny wool hats and little cardigans. 

I liked the basic, solid colored styles (Honest, Burt’s Bees, Gerber all make basic/affordable ones). Charlie still wears them (because I buy them for him) and they’re good for layering and lounging. I have bought this multi-colored pack for every age bracket (in both long and short sleeve, season dependent). 

I love H&M for basics like these types of sweatshirts and little sweatpants. Young Days for cuter-than-usual basics, especially pants (just got these and love). Also onesies. Hanna Andersson is great, too.

Drawer Dividers: The clothes are so smol they get lost /disorganized so easily and I found dividers to be so helpful. Millions of drawer organizers/dividers exist, but I like these simple ones the best. 

Pajamas: Everyone will tell you this, but avoid snaps. When I say they are too complicated and you think “how could a snap be too complicated” well, you’ll simply have to trust me that a snap will eventually become too complicated. Magnetic Me is great (they’re…magnets) and they have some cute prints if that’s your thing (I prefer solid colors), but anything with a zipper is great, too. I have bought the Hanna Andersson striped ones in every size because I love them so much. 

Sleep Sacks: We have a lot of Kyte sleep sacks. The Woolino ones are nice too, but pricier (though promise an all-season wearability and larger age range/sizing, so probably worth it). We just transitioned Charlie into this version, which is giving drop-crotch-as-aesthetic-choice. 

Booties: How does a sock fall off a foot that doesn’t even walk? I have tried all the socks and they ALL fall off, even the ones that promise to “never” fall off. These, on the other hand, were recommended to me by another mom and are the only thing I have ever tried that stayed on his feet while also keeping them warm. Also nice as “shoes” for when they learn how to walk. 

Tiny Scarfs (for drool and food): Buying in bulk will serve you well. We use these.

Hats: Did you know a baby needs a hat all the time? I didn't. Winter hats, summer hats– babies need a lot of hats. We love this hat in the summer (and generally like Pehr) and I'm fully obsessed with all the wool hats from MamaOwl for the winter. So nice I bought it twice!

Other Clothes: They grow so fast that anything too nice or precious feels like truly lighting your money on fire. This might be true forever! That said, this will not stop me from buying adorable knit wear. For other clothes if you’re looking for something special to give or receive: 

MamaOwl for excellent wool clothing for winter and nice, understated lightweight cotton for the warmer months, all in pleasing earth tones. I have this sweater and these pants both in Something from Nothing green. This is my favorite jacket. I sized up in all of these clothes which means we’re still getting plenty of mileage out of them. 

While I suspect slightly better for older kids, Misha and Puff has really sweet stuff for babies, too. Of the things I bought/was gifted in the early days, I found the cardigans got the most use– anything that can be easily layered to keep them warm that isn’t as performative as a jean jacket (guilty). This one is pretty perfect. Not a cardigan, but look at these! A very good hat! Aaaaand I just bought this. 

I’ll say it: Zara Kids & H&M kids are both amazing and I love everything they do. Clothes that are cheap and cute and you can dress your child up like a stylish little doll for not that much money, which is great because whatever you buy will be stained with food and washed a million times and worn for maybe six months! When Charlie was born, my dad discovered Zara Kids and bought him a ton of outfits that were basically just my dad dressing him like my dad (plaid buttondowns, jeans, this overshirt), it was very sweet. I especially like H&M for basics like these types of things. 

To offset my Amazon/Zara/H&M guilt, I also love love love shopping secondhand for Charlie. If you are lucky enough to live near a kids consignment shop, go often (also, obviously great to sell if you’re not passing down/donating). In Brooklyn, I like Owl Tree Kids on Court, Darling (mostly new, but they have some vintage things that are maybe not so practical, but damn are they precious!), and while not specifically for kids, The Consistency Project has an amazing little rack of deadstock stuff for older babies and kids (both on Atlantic Ave). 

MISCELLANEOUS

Food Delivery Gift Cards: Assuming not everyone is excited to make several batches of brothy beans and potato leek soup for the freezer, gift cards for your favorite local restaurant that delivers or any delivery food app are good ideas to request. You will use them. Your partner will use then. Anyone visiting the baby will use them.

House Cleaning: Post-baby, nobody has the time or energy to clean as well as you probably wished someone would clean. If it's an option, requesting (or gifting) a house cleaning right before you arrive home from the hospital is a real and true luxury. Perhaps if a few people are pooling together, you could offer to go in on several house cleaning sessions to help out the new parents during the first few weeks/months.

Phew. That’s it for now. While I’m sure I forgot a million things, I hope you or someone you know finds this useful, a good place to start. As always, check the comments section for additions from me or suggestions from other readers. See you later this week for a recipe that's convinced Charlie his favorite food is fish.

And for all my type-A paid subscribers, here’s an easy-to-read spreadsheet for your downloadable pleasure.